Monday, May 01, 2006
i moved to a new blog, wrestled with the html for a bit and now it's done.will let u guys know the add soon. ciao:)
rachel at 11:16 PM
Monday, April 24, 2006
most monday mornings i have to be up by 7am, so i was surprised when i woke up at close to 11am this morning. ahh after effects of trying out my bro's uberpowerful cough medicine to see if it would do anything for my long lasting cough (yes, it's goood).and, it is loverly to do everything on my own time. like sit down, fix myself a proper breakfast of a ciabatta sandwich with ham and read the newspaper, then being nice and washing the dishes.
i headed out for some shopping around noon but i was disappointed with marina square. as in, there aren't really any interesting shops. so i stopped by candy empire and took a long time as usual deciding what to buy and getting fascinated along the way.
so after coming home all i've done is to vacillate between the television and my laptop and it's all part of the plan to purge school out of my entire system for the next 3 months. :p
can't wait for more shopping and eating tomorrow - it's high time to revive my half-priced waffles tuesday ritual.
rachel at 11:13 PM
most monday mornings i have to be up by 7am, so i was surprised when i woke up at close to 11am this morning. ahh after effects of trying out my bro's uberpowerful cough medicine to see if it would do anything for my long lasting cough (yes, it's goood).and, it is loverly to do everything on my own time. like sit down, fix myself a proper breakfast of a ciabatta sandwich with ham and read the newspaper, then being nice and washing the dishes.
i headed out for some shopping around noon but i was disappointed with marina square. as in, there aren't really any interesting shops. so i stopped by candy empire and took a long time as usual deciding what to buy and getting fascinated along the way.
so after coming home all i've done is to vacillate between the television and my laptop and it's all part of the plan to purge school out of my entire system for the next 3 months. :p
can't wait for more shopping and eating tomorrow - it's high time to revive my half-priced waffles tuesday ritual.
rachel at 11:13 PM
Sunday, April 23, 2006
sat down to the usual sunday night dinner with my family earlier, and shortly after we'd started eating, we heard yelling from downstairs. my bro (naturally) got up and ran to the window and i followed. soon, my parents joined us when the yelling did not stop.should have known - it was a couple fight. except that the guy had two friends with him and the girl had a friend with her and was completely ignoring the guy. so he's ranting about how he's trying to save the relationship but she's being a fucking bitch and not picking up his calls (hurhur) and she walks away and sits down on a bench near the putting green.
anyway, the rest of my family decided to call security because the guy just continued his verbal abuse, except for me, who kept on protesting that they should be left to sort out their problems. i got a rather mortified response from them and i had to keep on telling them to keep quiet and for goodness sakes stop sticking their heads outta the window and making it so obvious that they're watching!! apparently though, they were worried the guy would get violent and commit a crime of passion.
in the end, my mom went to call security, wondering why none of the neighbours weren't doing anything, but the guy and his gang left shortly after the girl refused to say anything.
even though the guy was like, some ah beng pai kia, somehow his frustrations were understandable. my bro was saying what an irony it was for him to say he wanted to salvage the relationship when he was talking to her like that. but while i do not condone that kinda ungentlemanly attitude (and would in no way tolerate being treated like that!) i could recognise that sorta behavior. it's not uncommon in relationships gone sour. somehow there'll be one party who feels so frustrated at the other party for whatever reason and still wants to make the relationship work,while the other person is indifferent to him/her, or is equally frustrated but wants out of the relationship because it patently isn't working.
well, since situations like that are complicated and ugly and to be avoided at all costs in a relationship - as cliche as it sounds it's important for those in a relationship to communicate openly with each other and of course, maintain good relations even after.
rachel at 8:36 PM
Friday, April 21, 2006
yes, exams are finally over. and so's freshman year.no more school till august. *beams*
really exhausted from everything - the studying, the late nights, and still coughing in the midst of it all. but i'm sure i'll be good to go with lotsa rest in the next week or so.
in the long stretch ahead, i wanna do all the things i didn't get to do when school was going on, and picked up where my life was static. i can't wait.
anyway, i heard this piece of news earlier and it left me rather outraged. nationals are in full swing already for most sports. tennis is still in the round robin, or group, stages. so what i heard was that a certain junior college CUT FUNDING for its team when they still have games to go. this means that the particular team cannot train anymore because the school will not pay the coach, and this sucks because right now they need some guidance. the saving grace is that they're very united. by the way, the school didn't inform the coach of this, he only heard it later from his players.
seriously, like what the fuck?
there are people out there passionate about their sport and want to do well for themselves, their team or the school. there are people who are committed and train hard every week for a few times, and being able to play that sport makes them happy. apparently, certain schools do not appear to want to nurture their students or help them develop their potential as they are supposed to. these are students playing for their school and instead of supporting and motivating them to do well they bring them down.
so these kids will have no trophies to speak of, but only the happy memories they had working together as a team tainted by what recently happened.
*claps*
i never knew people could be capable of doing such things, but this just shows how unreasonable and unfeeling some of those in authority can be, with negligible EQ to boot.
it sure is fucked up out there.
right, okay, end of my long gripe over another prime example of how unfair life is. it's the hols dammit.
ya know, i noticed how it was sunny this afternoon (which is not an unusual occurence but in light of the recent buckets of rain that seem to come down without fail every day, it is) and how i felt like smiling and chatting away incessantly again.
i noticed how i paid attention to detail and smiled and how my mind, which has been a chaotic, saturated mess, cleared and settled into a state of calm.
and then i thought, well now, i'm finally out of the hole.
rachel at 9:09 PM
Friday, April 14, 2006
first day of exams went surprisingly okay. i've got a tendency to think of the worst case scenario, like not knowing the answers to anything, but last night was horrible. i stayed up so long with a cough of the hacking kind, which continued till today. naturally i'd to wake up feeling like crap - i think i got like 5 hours of sleep or less. i know it's the exams and all but my mind was cloudy and i was devoid of all inspiration and motivation. much more awake for the 2nd paper thanks to a cuppa tea but there was much less to write.it's time to cram majorly for my core modules now but the sense of urgency is lost on me. i watched too much tv tonight, am preoccupied with inconsequential things and i am feeling happy. well there's nothing wrong with being happy but it's the lighthearted carefree kinda happy that is sounding alarm bells - at least i should be fretting as well right?
gotta soldier on for one more week. sustenance comes in the form of coffee, tea, online shopping and the latest eps of the oc and gilmore girls. :)
rachel at 12:51 AM
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
long lonely nights, or 16 hour flights?i think i won't go - the timing perpetually seems to be wrong. i feel this sense of urgency to do as much as i can, experience as much as possible every chance i get so that i'd make the best out of everything i have but right now it all boils down to timing. it really kills me to wait but maybe, it'd be more worth it.
i woke up this morning to a cold and rainy morning and a bad cough, hoping for someone to cosy up too. that's when i got hit by a pang of loneliness. it's the same kind of solicitude that gabriel conroy feels in the dead by james joyce. as the snow slowly blankets the country he feels chilled to the bone and in the darkness, feels his soul slowly slipping away. one by one they were all becoming shades. better pass boldly into that other world, in the full glory of some passion, than fade and wither dismally with age. i love the prose in that short story especially right at the end. anyway, i digress.
just got home from a nice steamboat dinner with the whole family. making ice kachang is good fun too. i should try making it penang style next time - huge generous portions with ice-cream and peanuts sprinkled over, with extra servings of everything. i had a cuppa coffee so that should keep me well awake into the night. still lots to cover for thursday's papers and i'm swarmed by copious amounts of paper and things i do not understand - but, better late than never, i'm alot more focused now.
rachel at 11:10 PM
it seems like i've somehow fallen into the river of lethe.today was characterised by my muddleheadedness & inability to remember something that happened a short while ago. i couldn't even remember if i even did that particular thing. it's not so much doing something that you've done so many times that you end up just going through the motions. it's more of subconsciously knowing you need to do something but somehow it didn't register on a conscious level.
this is such an emotionally trying period of time and i'm not just talking about exams which, to quote blake, is "binding with briars my joys and desires". i'm screwed, is such an understatement. but it'll soon be over - the only thing that's constant is mutability, so says shelley. now if only more things that i've read, especially the criticism/analysis essays would stick in my head.
tomorrow had very well be a better day.
rachel at 12:40 AM
Saturday, April 08, 2006
i am on the verge of losing my voice. there was so much good food at the family bbq (bratwursts! chicken wings!) and i had so much to eat plus talked alot too, so now i'm reduced to croaking away and coughing.the weather this month has been totally schizo. it's sunny in the morning and pours in the afternoon. today was no exception although it rained around noon and the thunder/lightning was just freaky. the roads were flooded too so i waited quite awhile for a cab to take me home. i was kinda drenched and felt feverish in the afternoon so i took a nap. great, this is just what i need right now.
well i guess this all means that i haven't really done any studying. my head hurts but i'm gonna try to make it through the next two hours. the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak...
rachel at 11:56 PM
i need love and hugs right now, i miss people:(woke up this morning with a dry and scratchy throat, probably the result of eating fried chicken at glutton's bay last night. in addition i got the woozies again, cause of which is unknown. so i spent most of the day feeling giddy, which essentially meant that i sat in bed/on the couch and watched a fair amount of television and attempted to do some readings for lit. an absolute mess, i say.
the cobwebs in my brain need clearing. i've actually psyched myself up about studying but the only thing standing between me and chow mugger mode is this darned discomfort one can get from feeling under the weather. oh bugger...i guess i could do with more rest then.
rachel at 12:40 AM